couples therapy
why choose couples therapy?
some of the reasons why you and your partner might choose to go to couples therapy include:
- to improve communication • couples therapy can help you and your partner learn how to communicate more effectively with each other • this can include learning how to listen to each other without judgment, how to express their feelings in a healthy way, and how to resolve conflict peacefully
- to address relationship problems • couples therapy can help you and your partner address specific problems in their relationship, such as infidelity, financial problems, or parenting issues • therapy can help you both understand the root of the problem and develop strategies for resolving it
- to improve intimacy • couples therapy can help you and your partner reconnect with each other and rebuild intimacy • this can include learning how to express love and affection for each other, how to have more meaningful conversations, and how to enjoy each other's company • it can also include addressing problems in your sex life and help you communicate about your sexual needs and desires, so you can have more satisfying sex
- to
make a decision about the future of the relationship
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if you or your partner are unsure whether to stay together or break up, couples therapy can help you make a decision
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therapy can help you both explore your options, weigh the pros and cons of each option, and make a decision that is best for both of you
what I can help you with
couples therapy can also be helpful for those of you who simply want to improve their relationship
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therapy can help you and your partner learn how to better understand each other, how to work together as a team, and how to create a more fulfilling relationship
i have experience in helping people achieve the following benefits:
- improved communication and learning how to communicate more effectively with each other • this can include learning how to listen to each other without judgment, how to express their feelings in a healthy way, and how to resolve conflict peacefully
- increased intimacy and helping you reconnect with each other and rebuild intimacy • this can include learning how to express love and affection for each other, how to have more meaningful conversations, and how to enjoy each other's company
- better decision-making that can help you make better decisions about your relationship • this can include decisions about finances, parenting, or whether to stay together or break up
- reduced stress and helping you improve your overall well-being •
this is because therapy can help you and your partner to resolve conflict, improve communication, and build intimacy
"improving your relationship and building a stronger foundation for the future"
empathetic
actively listening, reflecting back emotional nuances, and seeking to fully grasp each partner's inner experiences in order to validate them
perceptive
identifying the underlying attachment fears and unmet needs encoded within protective behaviours and conflict interactions in the couple
responsive
warmly yet skillfully nurturing the expression of the primary feelings and vulnerabilities that open space for partners to securely reconnect
what to expect
first session
our first session is an opportunity to understand the key issues and perspectives from each partner, the history of the relationship, and the goals for therapy
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you can also ask me any questions, so you feel supported about the best way forward
therapeutic approach
i draw on a range of approaches including emotionally focused therapy (EFT) for couples, an evidence-based approach that views relationship distress as a result of underlying, unmet attachment needs that partners struggle expressing constructively
therapy offer
I help couples reframe their issues, better vocalise their vulnerable emotions, respond more empathetically to each other from a place of longing rather than reaction, to ultimately rewrite their negative interaction patterns that drive their conflicts
emotionally focused couples therapy
principles and techniques
find out more
identifying each individual's negative and positive attachment triggers stemming from childhood experiences with caretakers that shape emotional responses now as adults
helping partners become more aware of primary emotions and attachment fears (abandonment, engulfment, rejection) driving their reactions rather than just fighting over surface content
teaching couples to de-escalate destructive conflicts by pausing to further identify, understand and articulate these core feelings and needs that may otherwise get missed, in a safer climate
guiding empathetic dialogues and conversations focused on validation where each partner can fully express and be heard regarding underlying hurts and longings
helping each partner to nurture their positive bonds and to securely reconnect by responding attentively to the newly revealed emotional layers they are able to express to each other
gradually reshaping attachment bonds between partners so they can be vulnerable while also feeling safe, understood, comforted and reassured of each other's care and responsiveness in a deep way
